I'm not sure what's going on with FH, but it's very crazy and all over the place and I'm worried and people lied to me a lot.(._.) I don't know what to do about that. It makes me feel really bad when I don't know who I can trust, so now I'm a little afraid of the people I thought I knew, of my friends .
I'm really now down to about four people from Fig I can trust, which is very sad. Even then, that's not to say I'm on the best terms with them, it's just that I can trust them.
Who can we trust anymore? Are people still being honest? Are the people on this site any better?
I haven't been logged into Fighunter for months. Maybe a year by now. But I have been watching. And it is sad to see what is happening. I wasn't friends with any of the people who were banned or anybody involved with the most recent dramas. But in the on and off period that I spent before officially severing, I did see a few people that I considered to be decent acquaintances suddenly appear to act out and be banned in my absences.
It's a little hard to explain, but this issue of "trust" is a little skewed for me. I don't really assign that category in my spectrum of people I may call friends or acquaintances. I'm not even sure what the distinction is between those categories because above everything and everybody, I spend the most time only with my own thoughts. I suppose that I judge friendship these days by the amount of times I've had meaningful conversations with people and the amount of expectation I have in them to not personally hurt me. So I suppose that is "trust" for me.
It's probably different for you, though. I'm not sure how you define it as. My notion of trust is probably this poor because I barely interact with anybody and I have a cousin who I've known to be a compulsive liar ever since I can remember. I know he lies to me constantly. But I still see that time with him as meaningful, even if it is full of lies. It doesn't hurt and I find it somewhat interesting. And the things that he says, sometimes they really are motivating. Sometimes I do benefit from them. Just because it's all fake doesn't mean I can't take away something positive from it. For me, it's just all about ideals. It doesn't bother me too much. But I guess it's because most of the world just passes me by like a dream.
I do trust him in some sense, though. I trust that he won't emotionally hurt me. I don't trust that he will tell me the truth. But it's enough for me to trust that he won't hurt me.
I guess... Are you hurt by the idea that people could have been telling lies to you? Or are you hurt by the idea that your trust could have been betrayed? Because if it's the latter, depending on your definition of "trust," it might not include the former. It takes a little sorting to figure it out.
And I apologize if my logic seems odd or off in any way. It's all just the ramblings of somebody who spends too much time in their head.